sugarcanes

so i left guatemala and said goodbye to two (count em, TWO) sets of beautiful friends (did i honestly just say sets of friends?) and headed out to el salvador, the darkest, grimmest place in central america, driven by a nihilistic lack of regard for my own life and puapusas.

my first ride gave me a hat that says REDNECK VS COONASS 1989 SHOOTOUT.

my second is two brothers named jose and they invite me over to their ranch, if you could call a shack with a bunch of turkeys and cows a ranch and one jose asked me what i wanted, what was the point of travelling, one day i wake up in el salvador, one day i wake up in nicaragua, one day i wake up in colombia, why? what was i looking for? i tell him i have no idea and he says, well, come with me and maybe you will find something you like.

we go to this big field of exhausted sugar canes and set the fucker on fire.

i go back to his place and his shirtless dad is yelling raspy spanish at me and i have no idea what he is saying but he sure is friendly and awesome. later that night i get a taste of a real tropical rainstorm in this tiny shed...

in the morning the brothers jose hook me up with one of their trucks (besides professional field burners, they also own a trucking company!) and it takes me about a hundred kilometers in the most blinged out truck i have ever seen. on the side of it there is a huge picture of jesus hovering over a truck. that says everything.

i make it to honduras. the first honduran i meet is this asshole border guard who wont let me pass without three american dollars. i tell him in no uncertain words to fuck his mom, which might actually be uncertain because i only know how to curse in mexican, and find some money.

the second honduran i meet is a cop. i tell him my story and he tells me that not only can i hitch beside him, he will make the next driver going to nicaragua take me.

he pulls over mario, who is going to costa rica! alright!



driving through nicaragua i got a huge boner for all the red and black everywhere, which i know isnt anarchist in this country but come on, the fsln is pretty cool, right? well. even in socialist nicaragua they still have massive chains everywhere and beer commercials targetting nicaraguans featuring only white people. also nicaraguans hate white people more than anyone else i have met.



anyways. panama next. costa rica is beautiful and all my rides speak english. but it is expensive and all my rides speak english.


oh, and heres an irony for you: after all of el salvador, i never got an authentic salvadorean pupusa. the banks didnt work and i had only 25 cents (they use american currency, who knows why).